A Villainous Time Of Year

It's October 1st, ladies and gentlemen, and we all know what that means. Halloween is less than a month away! I don't know why, the older I've grown the more I love this time of year, but it is quickly becoming my favorite. Maybe it's just because I love the fall, and I associate Halloween with that. Probably not though because I love the idea of scary movies, haunted houses, and ghost stories. So in honor of that, I have planned an exciting month of Halloween blogs that will hopefully get everyone in the mood for the holiday.

We begin today with a list of the most creepy, memorable bad guys of all time. Now remember, rated R movies are out, so many of you will be disappointed that your Jason's or your Freddy Kruger's, or your Michael Myers' are not on here. But face it, those guys are only creepy because of the gore. Plus, let's be honest, if they were included there's not really anyone that could compete with Hannibal Lector. Instead, we have a decent conglomeration of old baddies and new ones, some from scary movies and some from not so scary movies. I present to you villains that if you've seen them, will leave an impression.

I've taken the liberty of ranking them on their creepiness and their evilness for your convenience. Along the way, you'll get lessons on how to be a grade A villain. Yes, I am totally aware that many of you will still have your favorite missing. But we all know solution to that right! ;) I look forward to your well-structured responses in the comments. Now, let's get started with the creepiest time of year!

10. Fernand Mondego

Creepy Factor: 4

Evil Factor: 6

 Step one to being an evil jerk: be an arrogant, backstabbing, pile of deification.Count Mondego wasn't that creepy. If anything he was just easy to hate because he was so annoyingly evil. I know it's not the same in the book, but any guy that would send his best friend in the world to jail just so he could engage in "wrong-sided business" with his girl is pretty evil. Then to top it off he blatantly cheats on the girl, engages in murder and conspiracy to murder, and then attempts to rob and imprison the first guy all over again. (Even if he doesn't know it's the same guy.) In conclusion, this is the kind of villain you just love to hate and pray that he gets his come-unpins

9. James Moriarty

Creepy Factor: 5

Evil Factor: 6

 In case you didn't know... if a guy sticks a hook through your shoulder, hangs you from the ceiling, and then commences to sing opera and dance around you... HE'S CREEPY! James Moriarty isn't just creepy, he is also really evil. Not only in the movie but in Doyle's stories; the guy has his hands in every nefarious pot in town (make that in Europe.) Combine that with a genius equivalent to his madness and you've got yourself a good villain. A good sign of how scary someone can be is the fact that the hero who takes him down has to fake death to ensure his safety. Make sure you bring your supply of oxygen.

8. Queen Bavmorda

Creepy Factor: 7

 Evil Factor: 6

 Some of you young ones won't have a clue who this is, so let me explain. This lady is what used to keep us twenty-somethings awake at night. Queen Bavmorda is the evil sorceress from the movie Willow. Not only is she evil enough to sacrifice a baby to increase her own power, but she has the power to turn an entire opposing army into pigs. (If you can get yourself some evil powers, that will totally boost your villainous rep.) Lucky for us, she can be fooled by the most simple magic trick. But still, I challenge you to sleep peaceful after the climax scene of this movie. It reeks of creepy.

7. Darth Maul

Creepy Factor:7

Evil Factor: 7

 I'm secure enough to admit that if I see this guy coming my direction... yeah, I'm going the other way. A pretty important key to being a good villain is intimidation and covering your face in black and red tattoos. That will definitely do the trick. I know there are probably two complaints about this choice: 1) That it comes from the worst movie of the series, and 2) why not Darth Vader? Well, regardless of how bad the movie is, this dude is the one part written well. I mean, come on, this was the guy that took down Liam Neeson for goodness sake! And as for Darth Vader, he kind of loses his creep and evil factor when you see how whinny and annoying he was as a kid. I stand by this choice as one of the creepiest bad guys ever.

6. Mort Rainey 

Creep Factor: 6

Evil Factor: 8

 "'I know I can do it,' Todd Downey said, helping himself to another ear of corn from the steaming bowl. 'I'm sure that in time, every bit of her will be gone and her death will be a mystery... even to me.'" If you enjoy scaring the heck out of people this is a good line to have in your artillery. The creepiest part about Mort Rainey is that he is so dang likeable... until you find out he is a schizophrenic killer! A few rules when your up against a guy like this: 1) Don't call a person your trying to protect right into a perfect trap, 2) don't fumble with the keys! Get them in the dang hole and drive off, and 3) don't cheat on a guy and assume you can be best friends with him. Follow these lessons and you really don't need to worry about this kind of villain.

5. Maleficent 

Creepy Factor:7

Evil Factor: 9

Surprised? Well, you shouldn't be. This women is truly evil AND creepy. If you doubt me, just go back and watch. If you're unmotivated to take action just because of a silly blog you read, I'll make my point. You have here a sorceress so wicked that she is willing to kill a baby just for getting snubbed on a party invite. And she won't let that grudge go even after sixteen years! What can we learn from this? Firstly, that she controls the powers of evil and secondly... she must be really bored. This is a terrible combination. Beware! Try to mess with her evil plans and she'll go all dragon mutation on you. Plus, man, I hate that evil minion crow of hers.

4. Mola Ram

Creepy Factor: 8

Evil Factor: 9

 It doesn't matter if your too young to know who this guy is. He's the one in your worst nightmares. Capable to ripping organs out of your chest cavity with his bare hands and a creepy chant, there is nothing welcoming about this guy. Not only does he apparently worship the devil and live in one of the most bug infested spots on the globe, but he was able to momentarily control the greatest adventure of all time: Indiana Jones. With a smile that made his own mother run for the hills, this guy has intimidation down to an art. To make it just completely inexcusable, he also runs a child labor sweat-shop... despicable... just despicable. However, he is proof of what I've said about villains before... you usually meet really messy ends.

3. Voldemort

Creepy Factor: 9

Evil Factor: 10

 Okay, it's really hard to put this guy as number three, but it's really hard to maintain your creep credit when you've been beat by a little boy four or five times... once when he was a baby. Come on, dude, get your evil act together! It's a little embarrassing. Still, he did manage to arrange the death of the greatest wizard of all time, so that counts for something. Still the guy has evil marked all over him... no really he even has the ink of the wrist to prove him. But let's sum up the evil. He's got the face of a snake (least popular animal ever) and can talk to them. He split his soul into seven pieces by killing people. He's killed so many people he probably mumbles "Avada Kedavra" when he snores. His old possessions have the power too, well, posses others. He has his own personal creep squad (with a name twice as creepy as they actually are).  The guys so evil people won't even say his name! This guy is going down in history as one of the bestest baddies of all time.

2. Norman Bates

Creepy Factor: 10

Evil Factor: 9

 

 Has anyone reading this even seen the old Psycho? If not, you really really should. The creepiness of this guy just grows the more you get to know him. At first you think he is just a pathetic loser still living with mom and has really lame hobbies. Then you think of him as an accessory to his murderous mother. Then finally you realize, no, this guy is just a freak through and through. My one complaint with this guy is that I'm not sure that "psycho" is a strong enough word. Regardless, I guarantee that you won't sleep for a week after seeing the result of this guy's cross-dressing habits. Still, the guy loses a point on the evil factor when you consider there still is at least a loving son somewhere in those multiple personalities. Ugh... just thinking about it gives me shudders galore.

1. Joker  

Creepy Factor: 10

Evil Factor: 10

This list deserves a better class of criminal, and boy did this guy give us one. This villian, in my humble opinion, has the scariest motivation for evil ever. Simply put, there isn't one--he's just having fun. The Joker has been called a nihilist (the belief that there is no meaning in life), but this guy is beyond that; he is just wants to make the world burn and doesn't care about to have reason. To make it worse, the guy doesn't seem to want anything... at all! Everyone else on this list had some reason, something that they were trying to achieve or maintain. If a person doesn't want or need anything, you can't understand him, and you always fear what you don't understand. That, in essence, is why this guy takes the evil cake. The fact that someone could just shoot him and end it makes him human. The fact that no one does makes him terrifying. In the wolf pack of villains, he is Alpha and no one is brave enough to contest. Rationalize as much as you want, if this guy existed, you'd resort to zombie apocalypse survival skills. Stock up and wait it out, that's your best bet.